Here’s some random stuff about me I bet you never even thought about . . .

February 9, 2012

So yesterday I blogged for the first time in, like three months, and then I was all, oh, shit, people are going to expect me to do this AGAIN (granted, only five people, but still. The pressure.)

But luckily for me, I was handed—granted—awarded even, a readymade blog topic from my new friend Janis from Grammy JJ’s Ponderings. Ordinarily these memes tend to make me groan—You know, I’m such a REBEL, I don’t do no stinkin’ memes–but Grammy JJ is relatively new to blogging (ha ha, like I’m such an old hand myself. Um. . . NOT) and I always like to help promote new bloggers like many lovely people did for me when I started out. And when I read her About page, I discovered we have several things in common: We are practically the same age, we’ve both worked in HR and we like reading history. Okay, we have a few things in common. But those are pretty big things, don’t ya think?

Anyways, it goes like this: Janis/Grammy JJ tagged me and ten other bloggers who are all way cooler than I and I don’t even know what I’m doing being included in this group but hey, there’s no accounting for some people’s tastes. She composed 11 very thought-provoking questions (get it—11 questions, 11 bloggers?) for us to answer. We who have been tagged must (well, not must; participation is completely voluntary but I’m just telling you right now since I did it, if you don’t I’m going to put a voodoo curse on you and YOU’LL NEVER HAVE A DECENT MANI/PEDI AGAIN) then come up with our own questions and tag 11 more bloggers to answer them.

These are the questions posed to me and my well thought out* responses:

1. What is your favorite holiday and why? Halloween. Orange is my favorite color. I trained myself to make it so, since my high school’s team colors were orange and black. I wasn’t on a team of any kind, so I’m not sure why this was important. And I enjoy making costumes for my children like this

and this 

2. What is your favorite on-line store/shopping place? (I love to find new stores) Hm. I don’t do a lot of online shopping. I don’t do a lot of shopping, period, as I would rather have my eyelids gnawed off by rabid vampire bats (which can totally happen, by the way) than shop. I have recently caved and downloaded the Kindle app for my iPhone, and downloading books is pretty cool. . . So, Amazon?

3. If you could visit any country in the world, where would it be and why? New Zealand. Peter Jackson made it look pretty damn awesome in Lord of the Rings. Seriously? Middle Earth has to be kicking now that Sauron is gone. I would live in one of those adorable Smurf-type houses in the Shire in a minute.

4. Are you a cat or dog person & why? (and no bashing the other type) Well, at present I would have to say I’m a dog person, seeing how I have four dogs. But at other times I have been a cat person, with as many as 13 cats at one time. I haven’t had a cat in over a year, which is weird, because I have always had both, but I’m not hankering for a cat. I’m not even hankering for the dogs I have. They’re annoying as hell. Wait. What was the question? Oh, yeah. I guess I’m more a dog person, because I like company when I walk but I don’t want to actually have to make conversation.

5. What’s your favorite fast food? Right now it is Arby’s Jalapeno Poppers, no contest. I don’t know why those idiots ever took them off the menu in the first damn place. That Bronco Berry sauce? To die for. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t contain any broncos, though. But it could. You never know what they put in fast food these days. I mean, have you seen that disgusting pink goo chicken nuggets are supposedly made of? Hm. The Bronco Berry sauce is rather pink, now that I think about it. No. No. NO. I am not going to think about it.

6. If you were only to have one last meal on this earth – what would it consist of? (notice a food theme here?)  I like a lot of food. All kinds of food. Loaded baked potato, for sure, because I hardly ever let myself eat one without feeling crushing guilt from all the carbs. Mac & cheese, both homemade and the Kraft box version. A box of Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies. That’s right. I said A BOX. Don’t judge. It’s my last meal, dammit.

7. As a kid, what did you call your Grandmother & Grandfather? My family lived near my maternal grandparents when I was young. I called them Grandma and Grandpa. Unoriginal, huh? But I didn’t get to pick. I was told that was who they were, and there were many, many grandchildren before me to set the precedent (my mother is seventh of nine kids). My dad’s parents lived several hours away and due to some familial rift of which I have only the sketchiest details, I only saw them three or four times my entire life. My grandmother referred to herself as “Grandma,” but in my mind, I already had a grandma. I always called her Grandmother. My dad’s father was Pawpaw, which I think is dumb and left to my own devices would have never chosen, but again, the older grandchildren had already established the appellation.

8. Favorite TV show from your teen years? I don’t remember having a favorite, but these are the ones I remember watching regularly: Donny and Marie? Was that on when I was a teenager? I don’t remember the time, but I do remember having a huge crush on Donny when I was quite young. Greatest American Hero—loved the theme song and that adorable William Katt. Bosom Buddies. Tom Hanks used to be cute. And—wait for it—The Dukes of Hazard. Bo Duke. Need I say anything more? I didn’t think so.

Wow. I had lousy taste in television programming when I was young.

9. All-time favorite song? “Urgent” by Foreigner. I love the saxophone, and that solo makes me WILD.

10. What’s your favorite reality show?  Bad Girls Club on the Oxygen channel. I will confess right now to being insanely jealous of trashy girls who get to live in a fabulous house and do nothing more than fight with each other, curse, get plastered, and bring nameless boys/girls home from bars for meaningless sex.

11. Do you like to play board/card games? If so, what’s your favorite? I love board and card games. Clue is probably my favorite board game. I love the Who Done It mystery and fantasize about being invited to a swank party at a house just like the one depicted on the game board. My favorite card game is Spider Solitaire, but I don’t know if it counts since I’ve never played it with actual cards. At the time of this writing I have played 2,274 games of Spider Solitaire on my iPhone, so . . . Yeah, I have problems.

*mostly incoherent

And now it’s time for me to come up with 11 questions.

1. What is your most irrational, ridiculous fear and in what way, if any, does this interfere with your daily activities?

2. Have you ever had head lice, and if yes, when?

3. Picard or Kirk, and why? And if you don’t know what I’m talking about, you should. Shame on you.

4. How often, ever if, do you sweep/vacuum your floors?

5. What is the scariest movie you have ever seen?

6. What is the worst movie you have ever seen? (I love both scary and poorly made movies with all my heart.)

7. Have you ever peed in the shower? HONEST ANSWERS ONLY.

8. What is it about coffee that you people like so much?

9. Would you rather have a cupcake or a real, honest-to-goodness as-god-intended-it piece of cake? Think carefully before answering. I’ll totally judge you if you say cupcake.

10. How many Jeremy London movies have you seen, and for god’s sake, why?

11. Can you recommend any hardy menstruating prostitutes for a Bigfoot expedition?

Okay, that last question was suggested by my husband, but I was running out of steam anyway. YOU, and YOU and YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU and don’t think YOU’re getting off the hook–get busy. We want ANSWERS, DAMMIT!

Not Blessed Mama

One Chunky Mama

Elle the Heiress


Unintentionally Brilliant

My Life as an Officer’s Wife

Mayor Gia Oh, and I was just at your site to get this link, and I saw you just did two of these things, so ha ha ha on you. But–the popcorn spoon? Fucking brilliant. I’m going to eat popcorn like that RIGHT THIS MINUTE AND FOREVER AFTER.


Not a Real Princess

Dude and Sweets

Seven Yuck Mouths & Autism

And just so you know, my system for pick my eleven was totally fair. I went down my mentions column in Tweetdeck. That’ll teach you to @ me, muah hah hah!


{ 34 comments… read them below or add one }

Mayor Gia February 9, 2012 at 10:24 am

Hahahaha thanks for the shoutout! I guess since you complimented popcorn spoon, i HAVE to answer, no? 😛


Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:35 pm

Most certainly you do. And really, the popcorn spoon is effing genius.


Jaime February 9, 2012 at 10:30 am

Seems like this shit is going around like herpes.. I like your answers AND your questions….. And honestly… I prefer cupcakes… They are more moist and if you go to the fancy cupcake places they have ones with filling and they always put tons of icing on…. And we all know the point of eating cake is for the icing…. So I think my answer is perfectly legitimate!


Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:24 pm

No, no, no. Cupcakes are just too much damn work. Peeling that stupid paper wrapping off for what? Two, three bites? CAKE ALL THE WAY.


Janis February 9, 2012 at 10:55 am

Love your answers! Thanks for playing!


Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:22 pm

Thanks for thinking of me!


Jim W. February 9, 2012 at 11:20 am

I like this! I can’t wait to read tomorrow’s post!


Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:21 pm

Tomorrow’s . . . post?


jacqui February 9, 2012 at 11:27 am

I love the costumes you made. Halloween is my favorite holiday too. I would live in a Smurf type house with Little Debbie cakes…do you want to split the rent?

I can’t believe I’ve been tagged for the third time this week. I probably should disconnect my internet service. 😉


Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Hello, roomie! Yeah, I couldn’t believe I was tagged at all since I’d dropped of the blogging face of the world. Let’s make a pact not to tag either anymore, shall we? Better yet, LET’S JUST SAY NO. We’re too old to be peer pressured, aren’t we?


Bubbe February 9, 2012 at 11:33 am

You didn’t ask me but I have to say Picard all the WAY! He could read me the dictionary and I’d get all um… excited! Yeah, that’s it – excited. And who the heck is Jeremy London?


Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:17 pm

Love me some Patrick Stewart. And ask Lady Estrogen who Jeremy London is. She’s an authority on the subject.


Carmen February 9, 2012 at 1:26 pm

and the pressure is on for more blog posts…



Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:35 pm



HeathRobots February 9, 2012 at 4:53 pm

You asked, so I answered. I guess that makes you my Internet overlord now. I am okay with that, if it means you will be making my Halloween costume this year. Those are amazing!


Handflapper February 9, 2012 at 6:07 pm

Why, thank you, darling, and it would be an honor. Maybe we could be themed characters?


lgalaviz February 9, 2012 at 8:37 pm

I don’t know how useful this exercise was for writing, but it has given me a huge craving for Arby’s Jalapeno Poppers. Arby’s should pay you.


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:28 pm

They should. That was a brilliant bit of promotion, wasn’t it?


Angela@BeggingTheAnswer February 10, 2012 at 8:51 pm

Now I want Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies like no one’s business…


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:29 pm

I think that’s what I’m having for dinner.


Marianna Annadanna February 10, 2012 at 10:42 pm

I know the Pikard or Kirk thing! Hahahahaha!


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:29 pm



Rusti February 13, 2012 at 2:20 pm

TOTALLY slacking on this – I apologize!! going to answer your Q’s and publish that darn post… as soon as I come up with 11 Q’s and people of my own… crap. 🙂


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:28 pm

It’s okay. I’m slacking in reading your answers!


Flannery February 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm

Foreigner??? Really? I mean, there’s only a gazillion other, better songs and bands. Now it’s in my head, and it won’t ever come out. Curse you.

Oh, and Bad Girl’s Club is pure trashy awesomeness. We live for the chick fights. Hmmm, maybe we should get a life, huh? Eh, whatever, I still like the chick fights.


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:26 pm

The chick fights are the best. You would think we were guys or something.


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:27 pm

And I didn’t stay it was a great song, great band, whatever. It’s just my FAVORITE.


Mia February 14, 2012 at 4:36 am

hardy menstruating prostitutes… hmmm…
so, what about hard menstruating field biologists? You could kill two bigfeet with one stone.


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:26 pm

Husband is most excited by your offer. As you point out, it does satisfy two of the necessities of the trip: field biologist AND menstruation. He will be contacting you.


J.D. February 15, 2012 at 1:35 pm

I’m a little jealous of the BGC girls too. Those houses are nice & well-stocked with liquor, apparently.


Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:24 pm

It doesn’t look like the cheap stuff, either. And the pool! The hot tub! Where can I sign up to be a stupid skank whore?


SassyB February 15, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Did you have the Donny and Marie dolls? I did..purple outfits and purple SOCKS on Donny…Somehow, they ended up in an incestuous relationship at our house…maybe because I didn’t have a Ken doll. And TV just wasn’t your taste…tv sucked back then.

Yes…I chose you for an award… can chose to participate or not. I am okay with that. I just love you..but not in THAT way. But I would be willing to send you a box of Oatmeal Creme Pies…they are always in my pantry. I don’t eat them though…


SassyB February 15, 2012 at 2:47 pm
Handflapper February 27, 2012 at 6:22 pm

I did NOT have Donny and Marie dolls, but if I did, I would pull Marie’s dumb head off and pitch her in the yard for the dog to chew on. Donny! Donny! Donny!

I am belatedly getting around to accepting my award. Death in the family, extra kids around, etc. etc. And I love you but I am suspicious–Why the hell are you NOT eating the Oatmeal Creme Pies???


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